Mother’s up in Heaven now
And one wonders what its like
Do you get to drive a car up there?
Cut your hair, or ride a bike?
Is there anything like bar-b-que?
Chocolate milkshakes or french fries?
Baseball games or tournaments?
Or coconut cream pies?
Are we still required to brush our teeth?
Will the lawns need mowed each week?
In the presence of omniscience
Will kids still play hide and seek?
Who picks up the garbage there?
Are there sewers ‘neath the streets?
Is there cable? Maybe movies?
Will we organize retreats?
Will the angels tell us stories?
Will the cherubim sing songs?
Are there pockets in our white robes?
Hostess Ho-Hos or Ding Dongs?
Will we still need our alarm clocks?
Take vacations time to time?
Are there shoes or boots or sandals?
Will snails still leave trails of slime?
These are the things I think about
When darkness hides the day
When thoughts of Heaven flood my mind
And carry me away
But – There ARE some things I know for sure
Because my Mother’s there
She’s been making her suggestions
With the utmost thought and care
No one at a banquet there
St. Peter not excluded
Can take a seat till Mother says
Let no one be deluded
There’s macaroni salad there
The kind that Mother makes
That means for sure there’s Hellman’s there
And whatever else that takes
I know that there is Juicy Fruit
E’en there in Heaven’s door
Because I’m sure she took her purse
And its FULL with earthly store
I know that there are Goldfish
Cuz’ even Zion needs its crackers
And Mom will turn the Heavenly host
Into full fledged Heav’nly snackers
Baggies of every size and shape
Will be bountifully supplied
So that every feast will end
With all leftovers bagged and tied
And there’s Christmas decorations
Strung from clouds both high and low
And piles and piles of coupons
Tho where to use them no one knows
Yes Heaven’s been a different place
Since the time my Mom’s been there
No doubt its been the first time that
There’s ever been a scare
Last, I think about the joy I’ll have
To see her face with glory lit
When she’ll greet me at my coming Home
And she can tell me where to sit.