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  • Playing 20 Questions. OK, only 3.

    October 11th, 2011

    Ephesians 5:11–14 “Take no part in the unfruitful works of darkness, but instead expose them. 12For it is shameful even to speak of the things that they do in secret. 13But when anything is exposed by the light, it becomes visible, 14for anything that becomes visible is light. Therefore it says, “Awake, O sleeper, and arise from the dead, and Christ will shine on you.”

    Bonhoeffer was right. In times of temptation, the Believer is not as much plagued with an urge to blaspheme God, as with forgetfulness of Him. His immediacy, His presence with us is obscured. In those moments, we sort of shift into automatic, not really thinking as much as acting upon impulse and reflex. Even when we’ve resisted for some time prior to actually caving in; our faculties are in gear, and then – tunnel vision and full speed ahead – the thinking has ended.

    But it is precisely when in the moment, in the very throes of temptation that thinking is what we need to do most. To slow down, and get a hold of ourselves, and ask 3 questions that Temptation desperately wants (read our FLESH desperately wants) to keep shoved out of the front of our consciousness. The three questions address three elements which are present in every temptation. This is true whether we are tempted to give in to anger, greed, lust, pride, envy, despair or anything else, you name it.

    Here’s what we must stop to ask ourselves:

    a. What is the LIE behind this temptation? What does it promise, that once scrutinized, it is clear it cannot deliver? And what is the true end result that it hides.

    b. What is the LUST it is promising to satisfy? What is the “hunger” it purports to fulfill? What is it within me this particular temptation resonates with? What precisely is the nature of my own sinful desire here?

    c. What is the LOVE which must be violated in order to do this? Love toward the God who saved me? Love toward my neighbor? (read: husband, wife, child, sibling, co-worker, stranger, etc.) Who is it I will have to stop the act of loving in order to take this action or attitude up?

    And if we take the time to stop and ask ourselves these 3 simple questions, we will soon find that the temptation looses both its attractiveness and its power. It becomes ugly and sordid. The vileness underneath its mask gets exposed to us. With this exposure, Temptation’s insistent knocking at the door of our desire soon slows, fades and stops. For then. Oh, it will return another day. But before you jump up to answer the door – stop to ask the questions one more time. You’ll be surprised.  

  • Guard Your Heart

    October 5th, 2011

    Proverbs 4:23–27 (ESV)

    23 Keep your heart with all vigilance,

    for from it flow the springs of life.

    24 Put away from you crooked speech,

    and put devious talk far from you.

    25 Let your eyes look directly forward,

    and your gaze be straight before you.

    26 Ponder the path of your feet;

    then all your ways will be sure.

    27 Do not swerve to the right or to the left;

    turn your foot away from evil.

    Keeping the heart is a call of dire need. The heart of the human being – is the core of life. Of course the organ that pumps blood is not being referred to here – but the organ of the soul that communicates life and purpose and passion to the whole being is intended. It is what the old theologians used to refer to as inward “inclination” – what each of us is inclined toward as the governing direction of our life’s pursuit – the gravitational pull of our inward man. What, when all else is stripped away, drives and motivates us.

    The truth is, many of us never even take the time to find out what exactly DOES motivate us above all else. We often flit from thing to thing still looking for an all consuming passion. But in reality, we already have one. It is at the bottom of all the choices we make in life. We simply haven’t identified it yet. For some it is safety. For others, pleasure. Still others seek meaning above all else, or a sense of accomplishment, approval, validation or simply to consume what seems most desirable at the moment.

    So how does one then “keep” or guard the heart, so that we are walking in wisdom and in fellowship with God and His eternal plans and purposes? What am I to be “vigilant” over for that to happen – so that the “springs of life” – the fountain of true joy and refreshment and sustenance remain unpolluted by the poisons of the Fall?

    Our Teacher points out four things.

    1. (24) One must cultivate honesty with themselves, and with others. If we are willing to entertain duplicity – to have secret lives, to live dishonestly with others, we will inevitably be habitual hypocrites. We must be brutally honest with ourselves about our own sinfulness and unwilling to seem better than we are to others – even if that invites rebuke. Passing ourselves off as Mr. or Ms. Altogether-Christian for the public consumption of others will lead us to hide, and at the same time to live in constant judgment of others. If you are constantly avoiding letting people see who you really are, or pointing the finger at other’s sins – this is probably your area of need.

    2. (25) We must be actually aimed at the goal of Heaven and Christ’s likeness. If that is not our goal and aim in life – if that is not where we are traveling to in life – then we are headed somewhere else. No one stumbles into Heaven – we go there intentionally or not at all. There will be no accidental tourists there. Those who have no clear destination will wander – emotionally, spiritually and in every other area of life. Are you on your way to meet the King? Are you actually plotting a course there? If not, you will not arrive.

    3. (26) We must examine and re-examine our decisions to see if they are commensurate with our stated goal and direction. The heart is distracted and polluted when our decision making practice does not at least include (at SOME point) the question as to how this decision fits with where I am going and who I am becoming in Christ. Countless woes would be avoided if we would ask this of ourselves before we entered into things. How does X fit with my journey to see Jesus? Does it help? Does it hinder? Is it compatible?

    4. (27) We cannot move off of the path that the Scripture has given us, and still get there. Isaiah calls it a “highway of holiness.” There is only one way to follow Christ – I must walk the same way He does, I must go WITH Him. And He is not going certain places. He is not heading into sexual immorality. He is not moving toward theft, or lust, or dishonesty, or coveting this world’s goods, or fame or pleasure. He is headed home to His Father. And there but one road there – Him. He Himself IS the truth, the life and the way.

    So my friend – where are you off to today? And how will you be getting there?

  • The Devil is in the details.

    September 23rd, 2011

    Mark 14:32–36 (ESV) And they went to a place called Gethsemane. And he said to his disciples, “Sit here while I pray.” 33And he took with him Peter and James and John, and began to be greatly distressed and troubled. 34And he said to them, “My soul is very sorrowful, even to death. Remain here and watch.” 35And going a little farther, he fell on the ground and prayed that, if it were possible, the hour might pass from him. 36And he said, “Abba, Father, all things are possible for you. Remove this cup from me. Yet not what I will, but what you will.” 
    There is a common saying which reads – “the Devil is in the details.” The idea being, that often, when struggling with something difficult to understand fully, there is some “catch”, some mysterious element which is escaping our notice. In actuality, the original phrase (as best as I can tell) was coined by the French novelist Gustave Flaubert and read: “the good God is in the detail”. His thought was, we are often overlooking the goodness of God in things – missing the small connection that brings it all together.

     

     

    Likewise, there are some exceedingly sweet and precious things to be had in the “details” of certain passages of Scripture sometimes – like ours today. And I note especially vs. 36 and its first few words: “And He said, Abba, Father.”

    Mark, carefully notes Jesus’ wording here with unusual precision – so as to call something out to our minds. He transliterates the Aramaic word “Abba” – and then gives its signification – “Father.” Why? Why not just use the Greek word “pater” (Father) and leave it at that? Why bother pointing to Jesus’ use of “Abba” in Aramic while writing everything else down in Greek?

    It would seem that he is especially wanting us to understand the true nature of Jesus’ prayer here, and the import it will have for us later.

    In Aramaic (the language which Jesus would have most often conversed in), there are two very similar words with overlapping meanings. First there is the word for father Jesus used here “Abba”. And, there is the word “Abbi”. “Abbi” also means father. The difference? Abbi is a very broad term – it can mean a natural father, but also a civil father – as in George Washington being the “father” of our nation. It can also refer to an Elder – a tribal father, or the father of a school of thought, etc. This is how the Jews thought of God as “Father” – as the Creator or progenitor of all things. So what’s the big deal? The deal is in the detail, that “Abba” is never used in the broad sense, but only in reference to one’s own natural father. Jesus was not using a broad term, but the most intimate, familial term there was. He was speaking to His “Dad”, His own, personal – Father. How this must have hit the three disciples who heard Him. The impact must have been profound.

    But it doesn’t end there. For the fascinating thing is, this word is found only 3 times in the New Testament, the first being here. The shock, is the two other times it is used – in Romans 8:14 and Galatians 4:6. And what is the context in those two places? That by virtue of becoming partakers of the Holy Spirit in salvation, the Believer gets to address God the Father as intimately as Jesus Himself: “And because you are sons, God has sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, crying, “Abba! Father!” (Gal. 4:6)

    Do you see what Paul does in both of these cases? He carries over this remarkable transliteration so that we get the full power of it driven home to us. It is the soul flooding reality that we get to live with the Father as intimately and truly and God the Incarnate Son. We share the same Spirit. We too – because of the cross, can cry “Abba, Father” – with no less reality and intimacy than Christ our Lord did in His most critical moments.

    You beloved – are truly that – beloved. Beloved of God as though natural sons and daughters. As truly His, as Christ Himself.

    Now THAT’S, a detail!

  • The BEST pun ever!

    September 21st, 2011

    An Englishman, a Scotsman, an Irishman, a Welshman, a Latvian, a Turk, a German, an Indian, several Americans (including a southerner, a New Englander, and a Californian) an Argentinean, a Dane, an Australian, a Slovakian, an Egyptian, a Japanese, a Moroccan, a Frenchman, a New Zealander, a Spaniard, a Russian, a Guatemalan, a Colombian, a Pakistani, a Malaysian, a Croatian, a Uzbek, a Cypriot, a Pole, a Lithuanian, a Chinese, a Sri Lankan, a Lebanese, a Cayman Islander, a Ugandan, a Vietnamese, a Korean, a Uruguayan, a Czech, an Icelander, a Mexican, a Finn, a Honduran, a Panamanian, an Andorran, an Israeli, a Venezuelan, a Fijian, a Peruvian, an Estonian, a Brazilian, a Portuguese, a Liechtensteiner, a Mongolian, a Hungarian, a Canadian, a Moldovan, a Haitian, a Norfolk Islander, a Macedonian, a Bolivian, a Cook Islander, a Tajikistani, a Samoan, an Armenian, an Aruban, an Albanian, a Greenlander, a Micronesian, a Virgin Islander, a Georgian, a Bahaman, a Belarusian, a Cuban, a Tongan, a Cambodian, a Qatari, an Azerbaijani, a Romanian, a Chilean, a Kyrgyzstani, a Jamaican, a Filipino, a Ukrainian, a Dutchman, a Ecuadorian, a Costa Rican, a Swede, a Bulgarian, a Serb, a Swiss, a Greek, a Belgian, a Singaporean, an Italian, a Norwegian and 47 Africans walk into a fine restaurant….

    The maître d’ scrutinizes the group one by one and stops their entrance saying,………………………………………………………
    “Sorry, you can’t come in here without a Thai.”
  • What she has done will be told in memory of her.

    September 21st, 2011

    Mark 14:3–9 (ESV) And while he was at Bethany in the house of Simon the leper, as he was reclining at table, a woman came with an alabaster flask of ointment of pure nard, very costly, and she broke the flask and poured it over his head. 4There were some who said to themselves indignantly, “Why was the ointment wasted like that? 5For this ointment could have been sold for more than three hundred denarii and given to the poor.” And they scolded her. 6But Jesus said, “Leave her alone. Why do you trouble her? She has done a beautiful thing to me. 7For you always have the poor with you, and whenever you want, you can do good for them. But you will not always have me. 8She has done what she could; she has anointed my body beforehand for burial. 9And truly, I say to you, wherever the gospel is proclaimed in the whole world, what she has done will be told in memory of her.”

    I find 3 remarkable things here –

    a. She broke the flask rather than uncorking it. In other words – she was intending to give all, and save nothing for any other use than to bless her Lord. How unlike our present devotion to Christ – which is often so careful to keep back enough for ourselves. “All things in moderation” may be a fitting maxim for temporal things – but who yet has ever expended all for the Savior’s glory? Father, give me this heart with all I have in this life.

    b. Lightfoot notes that the Rabbins thought it improper to be anointed with aromatic oils. This was looked down upon as not fitting and indecent. It was something for dandies, but not for scholars. But Jesus receives it as it is given – not as the customs would dictate. How much she cared more to bless her Savior than for whether or not others would appreciate it, or even understand it. Christ is her only focus. Blessing Him is all she can think of. And how it looks to others is neither contemplated by her – OR Him. He receives it as given. Father God – give me this heart. Give me THIS heart!

    c. In all, it speaks of pure excess given out of love. Oh that my own heart would lavish on Him that which the world would deem unseemly and excessive! What one of us, before we leave this life will ever be thought excessive or extravagant or lavish in praise, love and adoration of our Savior? What one of us will be thought less of, simply because we thought so much of Him? Who among us is in danger of this? Lord, let it be me!

  • Yes I will – A Communion poem

    September 5th, 2011

    1. Down from the mountain, the Savior came

    With the greatest of sermons complete

    The crowds still in awe thronged about Him

    But then one came, and fell at His feet

    REFRAIN: If you will Lord – If you will

    There’s no doubt that you can – if you will.

    If you will Lord – if you will

    There’s no hope but in you – If you will

    2. In his uncleanness the Leper came

    Falling, kneeling and making this prayer

    “Lord if you will, you can make me clean”

    In a mixture of hope and despair

    REFRAIN: If you will Lord – If you will

    There’s no doubt that you can – if you will.

    If you will Lord – if you will

    There’s no hope but in you – If you will

    3. In His sweet mercy the Savior spoke

    As He stretched out His hand and replied

    Touching the one that’s untouchable

    As the Leper’s own leprosy died!

    REFRAIN: Yes I will Child – YES, I will

    All who come may be clean, yes I will

    Yes I will Child – YES! I will!

    You can come and be clean, yes I will.

    4. In our uncleanness we sinners came

    Falling, kneeling and making our prayer

    Lord, if you will – you can make us clean

    Our uncleanness pervades everywhere

    REFRAIN: If you will Lord – If you will

    There’s no doubt that you can – if you will.

    If you will Lord – if you will

    There’s no hope but in you – If you will

    5. And in His sweet mercy He spoke to us

    Then He stretched out His hand yet again

    Touching us in our defilement,

    Then again, and again, and again!

    REFRAIN: Yes I will Child – YES, I will

    All who come may be clean, yes I will

    Yes I will Child – YES! I will!

    You can come and be clean, yes I will.

    Taken from – Matt. 8:1-3 / John 13:6-10 / 1 John 1:5-10

  • Minor-attraction – Not a mental disorder, a MORAL one.

    September 2nd, 2011

    Jeremiah 7:8–10 (ESV) “Behold, you trust in deceptive words to no avail. Will you steal, murder, commit adultery, swear falsely, make offerings to Baal, and go after other gods that you have not known, and then come and stand before me in this house, which is called by my name, and say, ‘We are delivered!’—only to go on doing all these abominations?

    On 8/20, one of our Pastors, Scott, on his Facebook page, called attention to an article, posted at LifeSiteNews.com regarding a conference to be held in Baltimore on Aug. 17 of this year. The article’s headline read: “Academic conference seeks to normalize pedophilia.” You can read the article for yourself at the following link.

    http://www.lifesitenews.com/news/academic-conference-seeks-to-normalize-pedophilia

    It was not the conference itself which prompted me to further action. The truth is, I expect to see more and more of this kind of thing as time goes on. Once Biblical norms for sexual activity (or any other kind for that matter) are abandoned, all behaviors are either accepted or rejected as normal in society by virtue of that Society’s own whims. “Normal” becomes defined as whatever seems acceptable at the time to any group willing to stand up for it. Beyond that, some other “norms” simply seep in over time – un-championed but simply tolerated until no longer even drawing attention.

    A respondent to Scott’s post queried whether or not this “news” was verifiable by some other source. I wondered the same and Googled a group mentioned in the article called “B4U-ACT” who were central participants in this conference. Among their stated concerns in dealing with “minor-attracted” people, are: “We believe that persons who are sexually attracted to children can be contributing members of their communities and that they deserve to be treated with respect. All clients should be treated in a caring, non-judgmental, and respectful manner. We see minor-attracted people as whole human beings, not as dangerous criminals or “deviants.” Therefore, we advocate the use of supportive therapeutic goals, assumptions, and approaches. Clients voluntarily seeking treatment should not be pressured or coerced to accept treatment modalities that they find objectionable.”

    The LifeSiteNews article goes on the say: “On their website B4U-ACT classifies pedophilia as simply another sexual orientation and decries the “stigma” attached to pedophilia, observing: “No one chooses to be emotionally and sexually attracted to children or adolescents. The cause is unknown; in fact, the development of attraction to adults is not understood.” The group says that it does not advocate treatment to change feelings of attraction to children or adolescents. ” B4U-ACT appears to be active in advocating that that “minor-attraction” (pedophilia to most) no longer be classified as a mental disorder in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders – DSM.

    The argument is that such is simply one more sexual orientation which ought to be understood rather than corrected. Just like homsexuality – or any other sexual attraction outside of heterosexuality.

    Once again, Scott’s respondent raised an issue, and objected to minor-attraction being classified as a mental disorder too. You may find it surprising that I agreed with him. But not for the reasons he might have thought – nor you. So I post my response to him in full to further the discussion. I’ve no doubt we need to go even further – especially in view of the growing move within Evangelical Churches to no longer treat homosexuality as a sin – but to embrace it and let people remain in bondage to a soul-damning lifestyle under the guise of being “right with God”. These issues are NOT going away.

    My response with slight modifications for use here: Dear _______ – What may surprise you, is that I wholeheartedly agree with the decision to remove and declassify homosexuality as a mental disorder in the DSM – though most likely not for the same reason(s) you may. And, I would say the very same for those who are currently classified as “minor-attracted”.

    As you noted, I would be guided by Biblical reasons in treating the topic – and find that classifying homosexuality as a “mental disorder” in the first place, removes it from the Biblical category of a moral disorder.

    Now let me be clear – homosexuality is not the catch-all bugaboo that many have made it out to be. All of us (from the Biblical worldview) are born with sinful tendencies of all kinds. Sin in each of us surfaces in a remarkable array of expressions. Homosexuality is but one of countless ways sin shows itself, and is neither the worst of all sins, unforgivable nor unconquerable in those whose disposition runs that way. Some are born with tendencies toward anger, others toward theft, still others toward unfaithfulness in marital relationships, uncontrolled sex drives of all kinds, pride, arrogance, greed, faithlessness – you name it. I have no doubt some are born with homosexuality at the very fore of their sinful nature, even as others are born with a predominate feature to their particular tendency. The point Biblically is that we need to: a. recognize the race-wide problem of sin, and, b. what God has done in Jesus Christ to address that problem – so that we might be reconciled to Him. And this, the Bible teaches is the Cross.

    I have no doubt that many will battle against the wrong bent of homosexual tendencies all of their lives (even after they become Christians) the way the prideful will battle their tendencies all of their days. But the good news of the Gospel is that God accepts Jesus’ death on Calvary in our place so as to be able to deliver us from the just wrath our sin deserves – and then places His own Spirit within Believers to give us the impetus to begin to walk in freedom from those tendencies rather than remain mastered by them.

    For the Christian – the mere tendency is no longer a condemned state. He (or she) can fully own their particular sin(s) as truly part of themselves, while fully accepted by God as they grow to be freed from them. But we must make no mistake here – Jesus did not die to leave us IN our sins, but to deliver us FROM them.

    Jeremiah 7:8–16 (ESV) “Behold, you trust in deceptive words to no avail. Will you steal, murder, commit adultery, swear falsely, make offerings to Baal, and go after other gods that you have not known, and then come and stand before me in this house, which is called by my name, and say, ‘We are delivered!’—only to go on doing all these abominations? Has this house, which is called by my name, become a den of robbers in your eyes? Behold, I myself have seen it, declares the Lord. Go now to my place that was in Shiloh, where I made my name dwell at first, and see what I did to it because of the evil of my people Israel. And now, because you have done all these things, declares the Lord, and when I spoke to you persistently you did not listen, and when I called you, you did not answer, therefore I will do to the house that is called by my name, and in which you trust, and to the place that I gave to you and to your fathers, as I did to Shiloh. And I will cast you out of my sight, as I cast out all your kinsmen, all the offspring of Ephraim.

    “As for you, do not pray for this people, or lift up a cry or prayer for them, and do not intercede with me, for I will not hear you.

  • Starving for affection – Proverbs 27:5-7

    August 27th, 2011

    Proverbs 27:5–7 (ESV)

    5 Better is open rebuke

    than hidden love.

    6 Faithful are the wounds of a friend;

    profuse are the kisses of an enemy.

    7 One who is full loathes honey,

    but to one who is hungry everything bitter is sweet.

    These three verses show three different aspects of the same concept. At the bottom of it all is the reality that the pain of being totally ignored is so great, that one would rather have a negative reaction from others, than no reaction at all.

    Many a parent withholds (for whatever reasons) signs of true affection and acceptance from their children. And little will goad them more into misbehavior than such an environment. For at least scoldings and punishments make them noticed. At least then they have some sense of impact and that their presence is not meaningless to others. But when ignored, they are bereft of the love they so desperately desire – and thus to a starving soul, even the bitterness of a rebuke is at least something – even if it isn’t honey. It’ll do. The love may indeed be there – but if it is not expressed, do not be surprised if the child (and even later – the adult who has been raised this way) is found repeating outrageous behavior so as to be interacted with on an emotional level.

    Now because this is true, such souls are liable to be drawn away into the snares of wicked people who would consume them like prey – because they will pour on profuse kisses where none have been before. We make them sitting ducks for sexual predators and others who would abuse them in relationships. The wounds of a “friend” are faithful. We know instinctively when we are being corrected in loving correction and when not. And if we correct our children only because they annoy us or embarrass us or disrupt us, the emotional vacuum left will indiscriminately draw in others who will take the utmost advantage of them by holding out the carrot stick of affection.

    The one who is well loved and accepted and KNOWS it, because it has been communicated and demonstrated, will be guarded against the predators. But when left emotionally emaciated by their parents (husbands and wives be warned here too), will seek to fill that void with anything they can – anything or anybody that pretends to offer to meet that need. They will gravitate to the most toxic people, if there appears the slightest promise of genuine affection there.

    This is precisely where John 3:16 comes into play. How is my soul to be fully satisfied in the love of God? In the cross! He SO loved us, that He gave His only Son. He did not love us from afar, silently or without demonstration – He sent His Son. He sent His Son to die – in our place. To take our wrath. To rebuke us for our sin, but in such a way that His faithfulness in love abounds. To make a way TO Him, the way that had been shut up by our sin in the Garden. To give us Heaven’s Sweetness, that we might not try to satiate our desires by consuming the pig’s pods of this world. And if we will take our fill of Him – how quickly desires for sin and the attempts to satisfy our souls on the dregs of this life will lose their attractiveness to us. We are fully accepted in the Beloved. And loved beyond measure. And that, in full display at Calvary.  

  • The Wounded Spirit – Tim Keller

    August 24th, 2011

    Eschewing the false reductionism offered by those who make very complex things like grief and depression and a crushed spirit oversimplified – Keller excels even his ordinary excellence in this exposition of Proverbs 13:12 and other like passages. This is a MUST listen.

    CLICK HERE:

  • My Mom’s body died today. Her soul went to be with Her Lord and Savior Jesus Christ..

    August 23rd, 2011

    Romans 5:1–6 (ESV) Therefore, since we have been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ. 2 Through him we have also obtained access by faith into this grace in which we stand, and we rejoice in hope of the glory of God. 3 More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, 4 and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, 5 and hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us. 6 For while we were still weak, at the right time Christ died for the ungodly.

    My Mom (our Mom – the 4 of us siblings, and numerous grandkids and great grandkids) went to be with Jesus @ 2:05 this morning.

    She was 88. Dad is 90.

    As one kind friend wrote – he was sorry for us in our “temporary” separation.

    That is just plain glorious – isn’t it?

    This is what it means to be a Christian in a way that is singly the most diametrically opposed to the world – death is an enemy which is at last overcome. And that, not as the World would see it as a supposed mere end to physical suffering, but because resurrection awaits.

    Because those who know Christ rise to meet Him in that veiled moment they pass from this life fully into His.

    And in it, we overcome in such remarkable likeness to our Lord – or rather, we see how truly like us He was in His humanity.

    He showed us that if we are one with the Father, we can die in weakness, and that is no shame.

    We can agonize over death as He did in the Garden – and that is no shame.

    We can cry the cry of “I thirst” in the torment of the moment – without shame.

    We can tremble -with no shame.

    Why? Because of our Hope.

    Not the “I hope so” kind of hope – the hope that is a living, real anticipation of the good things to come because of the goodness of the One who promised them, and who cannot fail to love His own with perfect, infinite love.

    Mom’s last hours were fitful. It is not always so for the saints. For many it is very different. For her, it was hard. And that’s OK.

    In the long hours of Friday night into Saturday, as it became clear in the hospital that she was failing more rapidly than we thought, I had some precious time alone with her.

    She said she needed to confess something to me, to get it put right. Once done, I thought it seemed a release to her.

    In fact it wasn’t a confession at all. It was setting the record straight for her.

    And though it is exceedingly intimate – I still want to to share it. For it points right back to the way Jesus enters into our humanity, and allows us as His redeemed, to enter into the secret places of His own suffering.

    Mom & Dad got pregnant on their wedding night. But what set some tongues to wagging, was that my sister, was born a month premature at less than 5 pounds. Nevertheless, in the eyes of some, it was eight months and not nine. She always felt bad, that people questioned their pre-marital purity. She had felt shamed by others – over what was in truth pure. And she wondered why the Lord had let that settle on her for the 65 years they were married.

    I had no specific answer, of course. Providence is often as mysterious as it is sovereign and good. But when she spoke of it, I could only think that Jesus had let her taste just a bit of the stigma that surrounded His own infinite purity in His virgin birth. That it was not meant to be millstone, as much as a point of intimacy with Him. A place where He could say to her through circumstances – “Lillian, child, come taste some of what I entered into for you, for all the redeemed, in a secret place.”

    I think we often fail to find Him in our own griefs – forgetting how He so fully entered into ours, so much that He died for the sin behind them. We fail, as those redeemed from the curse, to recognize that the suffering we still endure is still due to sin forgiven – and yet we still endure it. Because He endured for OUR sin, and none of His own.

    It seemed to settle her at that moment. And I left wanting to take more advantage of what the Savior allows me to suffer. That I might know Him better.

    But now, there is no more suffering for Mom. She experiences an intimacy with The Savior right now that is all rooted in the everlasting bliss of resurrection, instead of the former glory of the incarnation.

    Fall headlong into His kindness Mom – plunge in and luxuriate in it until we are all together again.

    I love you: Reid

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